Memory of a Banquet IV

This last walk down memory lane could quite possibly be the greatest one.  Yesterday's entry is very strong - the one at the Bald Eagle's house (trying to off the Rebels, mocking the Rebels at Gibson's homerun and unsuccessfully trying to get the rest of the league to join him in giving the champion Copperfields a Yoo-Hoo shower).  Very strong indeed.

But this one (I'm thinking it took place in the mid '90's) I feel takes the cake because it involves something so counter to the CFCL culture.  Yes, the police were called.

The police? Yep.  You heard me.  We bad.  And this wasn't involving my brother-in-law who is a cop (and former CFCL owner of the Flatfeet).  This is the establishment where the banquet was held . . . called the cops on the CFCL!

This particular banquet I don't think we had a massive turnout.  So we tried to find a middle ground for those owners who could attend.  I know for a fact that the Lambchops, Rebels and Copperfields attended.  I'm thinking - based on the location of the banquet - that the Meisters also showed up.  But that may have been it.

So since Paul and Eric lived in the Schaumburg-ish area and I lived in Aurora and David lived in Downers Grove, we selected Batavia/Geneva as the middle ground.  Not geographically perfect, but it makes for a great story.

One of us was charged with finding an establishment in that area.  Well what screams out Baseball Celebration better than Chinese food?  Nothing, it turns out, so we held our banquet at a Chinese restaurant.

The evening started out well enough.  We had a nice dinner, talked about the newly finished season, handed out the awards . . . and then things got crazy.  We kept talking, about CFCL matters, about how to fix the Cubs, about life.  Eventually any other attendees filtered out and all that was left were the Lambchops, Copperfields and Rebels.  And I don't mean all that was left from the banquet.  I mean all that was left IN THE RESTAURANT!  Yes, we closed that mother down!  (That is the first and only establishment I have ever closed.) 

But we are a bunch of baseball nerds and didn't realize what we were doing.  It took the waiter to come over and say "If you don't want anything else, we're trying to close."  Sheepish looks on our face as we settled the bill.  We kept chatting as we walked out of the restaurant.  And then like the baseball magpies we are, we just couldn't say "good-bye".  We kept talking and talking and talking in the middle of the parking lot.  Nothing seemed strange to us except perhaps that it was a little chilly to be standing outside talking baseball.

All of a sudden a squad car pulls in to the parking lot.  Again, we're clueless geeks.  We just keep on talking.  The officer pulls up to us, ** rolls his window down and says "What's going on guys?"

**  I don't know much about police procedure but usually officers will take tactical positions and keep their distance from potential perps.  This guy must have, as he was turning the corner into the parking lot, assessed the three of us and said to himself "Are you kidding?  What the hell am I doing here?"

"Oh nothing.  Just talking about baseball, officer."  Man were we cool.  The officer then points out that the workers in the restaurant want to go home ** and they're afraid to leave the place because they think you're waiting in the parking lot to jump them.

** as he's saying this, I'm thinking "why are you telling us that?  We left the restaurant, we don't need them anymore."

If you could call Hollywood and ask them to cast three guys who would never be confused with attempting to jump anyone you could not find three more appropriate guys than David, Eric and me.  Yet there the cop was saying "Maybe it's time to head home, right?"

The minute we heard we were keeping the workers in the restaurant and why, we all embarrassingly apologized and moved directly to our cars.  That was the night the CFCL took it to the streets and rumbled with the cops.

More pictures from this year's banquet.

The CFCL's local owners.  Why does it look like everyone's laughing at the Commissioner?
Going around the table to the left, starting in front: Matt Grage, Matt Bentel, Tim Morkert, Pat Chesnut, Matthew Barriball, Mike Coulter and Rich Bentel.

Mike Coulter enjoying sweet victory as he takes home the certificate for Best Free Agent Acquisition (Francisco Liriano).  In the background is Matthew Barriball (co-owner of The Swing) smiling contentedly knowing next year's certificate will be his.

Memory of a Banquet III

1988.  I still remember it like it was yesterday.  This banquet, or at least the highlights, stand out in my memory.  The Bald Eagles offered to host the banquet at their home in Brookfield.  We were there to celebrate the 1988 season and crown the, oh here's a shocker, Copperfields champion.

The evening started off on a typical note.  Bob, as host, went about offering his guests something to drink.  Interestingly he didn't ask me what I would like to drink.  After a few minutes he emerged from his kitchen with a strange looking glass of water.  He handed it to me and when I looked at the glass like "what the hell?" he explained that his pipes were kind of rusty.

Well I didn't play along with his little ruse and I came to find out that he loaded my glass of water with tobasco sauce.  Oh Bob, such a kidder.

I can actually, maybe for the only time other than this year's banquet, tell you the specific date of the banquet.  It was Saturday, October 15, 1988.  How do I know?  We were watching the World Series.  Game 1 of the World Series.

I know the Copperfields and Eagles were in attendance.  I think the Six Packs and Ruffins were there as well and it wouldn't surprise me if the Aces and Crocketts were there since Bob was their boss.  The Picks were most likely there as well because, well, what else would they have to do?  So it's possible we had the entire league in attendance.

I am most certain that in that house that night I was the only Oakland A fan.  Everyone else wanted the Dodgers to win.  I was riding high until the ninth inning when, as we all know, Kirk Gibson swung with one arm and somehow deposited Eckersley's backdoor slider halfway up the stands behind the right field wall.

I was crushed.  Looking back I'm embarrassed to say I was sucked in to the phenomena of the Bash Brothers.  But there still was The Eck, Welch, Stewart, Lansford, Parker, Henderson, Steinbach . . .

When Gibson homered the entire room erupted in joy and many fingers were pointed in my direction.  Monroe especially enjoyed pointing out that the A's had lost.  He was such a meanie.

The other part of the evening I recall was Bob trying to coerce a few other owners to douse the champion  Copperfields (this was their THIRD title IN A ROW) with Yoo-Hoo.  I can't remember if he was successful, but I do recall being out in the front yard running around for a while.

More pictures from this year's banquet:

Commissioner Bentel trying unsuccessfully to organize the award certificates.

The Revenge cautiously accepting their certificate for 7th place.  No doubt they wanted to finish in the money for a third straight year.  Notice the patrons in the background completely oblivious to the historical nature of this 30th consecutive gathering.

 "Really Mr. Coulter?  CFCL Champion last year?  That's amazing!"  Actually the Clowns and The Swing were most likely rehashing the specifics of the blockbuster trade they  made a few days earlier.  The first one of 2014 had the Clowns sending Adrian Gonzalez, Cole Hamel and Didi Gregorius to The Swing in exchange for Carlos Gonzalez.

Memory of a Banquet II

We held our first Banquet and Awards dinner in 1984 to celebrate the completion of our first year in fantasy baseball.  The first few years we held the banquet at my mom's house in River Forest.

I don't remember much about the first couple of banquets, but the one thing I do remember is that a blockbuster trade was made between the Friars and Sluggers during the second banquet.  They were sitting in our living room, in the swivel lounge chairs by the picture window.  The Friars kind of leaned over with their roster sheet and pointed to a couple of names.  The Sluggers looked at their roster sheet while the Friars said "What if I traded you him for him" as he continued to point at the rosters.  The Friars then laid out a reasoning as to why the trade would be a good idea, being all secretive and vague lest any wandering ears (like mine) would hear the highpowered negotiations.

It was cool.  It was awesome.  Turns out it was illegal.  Here's why.

The rules of Rotisserie League baseball state that when you draft a player you get that player for two years plus an option year.  So if I draft Derrek Lee this year (don't laugh - I LOVE Derrek Lee and the fact that he's been retired for three years, well I've done dumber things that's for sure) for .05 I have Lee at his .05 salary for 2014 and 2015.  In 2016 I could sign Lee for one more year at .05 and then lose him at the end of the season or I could sign him to a long term contract.

The rules stat that if I were to trade Lee this year or next (who would be dumb enough to take Lee in a trade considering he's retired?  Good point.  Nobod. . .. hold on.  Let me e-mail the Ruffins.) Lee's contract does not change.  So the new team would get Lee and have him until 2016 when they would need to make the decision to sign him for one year or long-term.

That's the rule and it has always been the rule.  Well, somehow in the infancy of our league we misread that rule.  So the Friars and Sluggers made a deal because we all were under the false impression that if you traded a player his contract would reset and the new team would have TWO NEW YEARS before having to make the decision to sign for the option year or go long-term.

So (and if you believe that rule, which we did, this trade proposal was brilliant in a way) the Friars proposed trading Dale Murphy to the Sluggers for Tim Raines.  The Friars had drafted Dale Murphy in 1984 for .61.  Yes, .61!  The Sluggers drafted Raines for .47 that same year.  The idea of being able to keep two incredibly talented players for two more years without having to sign a long-term contract was brilliant.  Too bad the move was illegal.  Also, the strong argument here is "Why would anyone draft a player for .61?"  Well, this was all new to us and we had a lot to learn.  But it worked for the Friars having Murphy on his team for .61 - he kept finishing in the money those first two seasons.

The deal was struck and announced and finalized.  I know at some point after the trade, possibly before Draft Day 1986 we determined that you can't trade like that and have the contract reset.  I don't recall if we did anything about it or said "From this point on . . . "  But it's a great memory.

Since we've reminisced about the beginning of the CFCL and the newness and such, here are some more photos from this year's banquet featuring our new owners of Hey Patta Matta Swing.

Sandwiched between the Revenge and Clowns, our new owners Pat Chesnut (in the awesome Cub hat) and Matt Barriball (in the equally awesome Wrigley Field shirt) are clearly captivated by the amazing words pouring out of the Commissioner's mouth.

The owners of Hey Patta Matta Swing eye the CFCL's ultimate prize - The Copperfield Trophy.

New owners Chesnut and Barriball absorb the handouts of the banquet, which included certificates and the league history of statistics - generously updated each year by League Historian David Mahlan.

Memory of a Banquet - I

As my memory pulls up the images it's telling me this banquet took place in 1997 or 2002.  Why of all the 30 banquets would my mind tell me to pick from those two years?  That in a minute.

The ambiance and positioning of TVs in the establishment suggest to me that we were at Giordano's in Oak Park.  So that leads me to believe it was more likely 1997 than 2002.  David and I began our migration deep into the western suburbs of Chicago in the late 90's or early 2000's with the growth of our respective families and at that point we settled in on HomeRun Inn in Darien.

Prior to that we held the banquets in our homes, at Giordano's, even at a Chinese restaurant (that's a story you don't want to miss).  But this story I'm pretty sure took place at Giordano's in Oak Park.  I seem to recall the room we were in, with a big screen TV near the ceiling (or maybe it was elevated in the bar area next to the room we were in).

Usually, for most owners, the allegiance to a given player ends with the last out of the regular season.  I may own Aaron Hill and want him to have an MVP year, but since I'm not really a Diamondback fan, once the post-season starts I don't want to see Hill beating up on a team I would like to get to the World Series.

Apparently that was not the case for one of our owners.  In 1997 (and work with me here that all the specific details I'm sharing are actually accurate) we were enjoying some pizza, camaraderie and award announcements with the NL playoffs on the television in the background.  David Mahlan (Commissioner and CFCL God) was smoothly running the award ceremonies when, in the middle of handing out an award, we heard "YEAH!!!!  WAY TO GO JT!!!" and saw Paul Zeledon (owner of Da Paul Meisters) jump up [literally] and clap because JT Snow got a single against the Marlins.

Mind you he didn't hit a game winning homerun, didn't drive in a run if I remember correctly.  He . . . got . . . a . . . single.  He got a single in the post-season which does not count one iota for CFCL purposes.  We all looked at Paul and said "Paul?  What are you doing?"  Paul responded, "Snow got a single!  He was on my team this year."  Didn't matter the single didn't count for the Meisters stats.  Paul just wanted all of his players that were in the post-season to do well.

And here's the best part (please, memory, please let this part be true as well).  As I remember it, JT Snow's contract with the Meisters expired at the end of the 1997 season.  So technically Paul was cheering for a player he no longer owned.

Right there, in a strange nutshell, epitomizes the essence, the passion, the geekiness of the CFCL and its owners.  To paraphrase a popular beer commercial of today "It's only strange if you're not in the CFCL."

More images from the 2013 Banquet:

The DoorMatts happily accepting their certificate (and envelope) for finishing in 3rd place - in the money for the 4th time in the last six years.

Commissioner Bentel showing the new owners the Copperfield Trophy (won by the Graging Bulls).  The trophy consists of two baseball cards (one of the top offensive player for the CFCL Champion and one of the top pitcher - this year it was Carlos Gomez and Stephen Strasburg); an engraved nameplate and a Cubs logo ball all signed by the 2013 CFCL owners at the draft.  At this point of the explanation Bentel may have been instructing . . . imploring . . . threatening the new owners "Do Not Sign In The Place Of Honor!"  The previous year's champion signs the ball underneath the Cubs logo in the Place of Honor.  It's fitting that this post was about the Meisters.  Paul could never quite follow the instructions to not sign in the Place of Honor.

CFCL Banquet

At long last the CFCL celebrated their own post-season by gathering at HomeRun Inn in Darien, IL, handing out awards, reliving the 2013 season and crowning its newest champion.

No, we usually don't hold the banquet this late in the off-season.  We typically try to meet during the baseball playoffs.  This year, however, the Commissioner was ridiculously delinquent in putting together the ballot which caused a delay in the voting which caused a delay in the printing of the awards, which cause the CFCL to meet for the banquet in mid-January.

This week we will be going down memory lane to relive special moments of the CFCL banquet.  Yes, believe it or not, there have been memorable events at the CFCL banquet, including one in which the police were called.  There, that should have you coming back each day.

For now, we celebrate the reason for the season - crowning the latest CFCL Champion.

Matt Grage, owner of the Graging Bulls, holding the Copperfield Trophy.  This was the Bulls' first championship in their fourteen year existence.